By Robert Yaniz Jr.

New stars and a new director leave the aging franchise sadly without any direction at all.

THE HYPE

Director Barry Sonnenfeld’s 1997 sci-fi comedy Men in Black — as listeners of the Crooked Table Podcast know — was a formative movie for me as a kid. The combination of Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones’ chemistry, the crackling and sly wit, the rich creature design and Oscar-winning makeup made it a compelling (and instantly rewatchable) film, the Ghostbusters of the 1990s. The two sequels — especially the abhorrent second film — failed to deliver on any of the above, but when Men in Black: International was announced, I thought perhaps the franchise would finally get its act together. With Thor: Ragnarok co-stars Chris Hemsworth and Tessa Thompson suiting up, surely this reboot would at least be the best entry since the original. Or so I assumed.

THE STORY

The trouble starts, believe it or not, during the opening sequence, wherein audiences are left wondering what happens next. From that moment on, the film presumes that audiences are fully on board with everything that follows, never feeling the pressure to earn our attention. We watch as Agent M (Thompson) discovers the Men in Black and is teamed up with washed-up Agent H (Hemsworth). Before long, the two are hot on the trail of another potentially world-ending catastrophe. While all the hallmarks of a Men in Black film are there, International riffs on what we’ve seen before without building its own characters or giving them a compelling story of their own.

THE CAST

Hemsworth and Thompson — who work so well together in the Marvel Cinematic Universe — are left powerless to elevate their underwritten roles. Sure, their onscreen presence is always welcome, but the chemistry just isn’t there like it was in Thor: Ragnarok. The supporting cast too wastes mega-talents like Liam Neeson, Rebecca Ferguson, Emma Thompson and Rafe Spall. The only member of the ensemble who leaves any kind of impression at all is Kumail Nanjiani, who voices a tiny alien named Pawny that accompanies agents H and M (missed opportunity for a gag there too) on their quest. That guy is a star. The rest of these folks, not so much.

THE PRODUCTION

Remember how fun the creatures and visual effects were in the first Men in Black? Don’t expect any of that here. International abandons just about all practical effects in favor of wonky CGI that barely feels connected to the actors onscreen and, in the best of cases, plays like a decade-old video game. The score by Danny Elfman — who did all three previous films — and Chris Bacon serves the film well, of course, but relies largely on previously established themes. Don’t expect a catchy pop tune underlining it all, like the ones Smith contributed to the first two films. You might find yourself actually missing Pitbull’s lackluster “Back in Time” track from Men in Black 3.

THE VERDICT

Truthfully, Men in Black International isn’t a terrible film. You could certainly do a lot worse if you’re lazing about at home doing laundry on a Sunday afternoon. However, considering the heights this franchise came from and the universe of possibilities at its feet, the film is easily one of the year’s biggest cinematic facepalms. Director F. Gary Gray is the man behind great films like The Negotiator and Straight Outta Compton, but after this one and the equally underwhelming The Fate of the Furious, his talents would be better applied away from big-budget franchise fare. As for the Men in Black series, maybe now we’ll finally see that bonkers franchise mashup with the Jump Street crew.

Men in Black: International stars Chris Hemsworth, Tessa Thompson, Liam Neeson, Emma Thompson, Rebecca Ferguson, Rafe Spall and the voice of Kumail Nanjiani and is directed by F. Gary Gray.